Interest Rate Drop, Life Balance, & Real Friends

September 11, 2024

Kyle: [00:00:00] Okay guys. Welcome back to another episode of The Briefcase in the Barn with me and Gary. The show, uh, series of the Furious Show where we have some real talks about business, life, Christianity, and more. Uh, today's sponsor is Lockbox. I am very much in favor of any product that makes your life better, which this here just to explain to everyone is a lockbox.

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Not two hours. Then Gary will shoot me. We'll have to break this box half far, half far, and it times down and then it's locked in here and you can't get it out unless you break the box without breaking the box. Yeah, without break the box. Which if you're Dutch. If you're Dutch, you won't break the box.

I've broken two boxes. You're not that Dutch. Anyways, it's a great tool to just unplug from your phone for the [00:01:00] evening or for the weekend from your family. I love it if you upload a link in the description. I don't make any money on this stuff, uh, on the lockbox anyway, and uh, I just really believe in it.

It makes your life better. So that is today's sponsor, Gary. Thanks for coming back. Been a couple weeks. It has. So good.

Gary: Couple weeks. Lots of things have happened. Yeah. Good vacation. Good vacation. Yeah, good vacation. Went to Orrville Washington with the family and my brother and sister-in-law came out for part of the time and hung out with my sister and her husband.

Were in a su so it was awesome. Sweet. Yeah. I mean, he was going on a holiday with five kids a holiday. Mothers would say probably not, huh? Yeah. Okay. Fathers would say, Hey, same as usual.

Kyle: Okay, well I got a bunch of good questions today. So at the end of this podcast, I'll answer some questions that I can't grab right now 'cause they're on my phone, so I should've written them, written them down.

Uh, but, uh, I posted on my, uh, Instagram story yesterday. Um, what are some things that, um, um, [00:02:00] people say are in the Bible but are actually not in the Bible? And so we'll answer some of those questions. So the one is, uh, gonna church twice, um, if women should wear skirts. Um, there was another one about, uh, God won't give you more than you can handle.

Yeah. Um, cleanliness is, cleanliness is next to godliness. Yeah. That's how some people live. Well, Angelo at the end of the podcast here, but first proverb over the week, which I thought you would enjoy knowing there's also interest rates drops again the last week. Yeah. This is from Proverb 22, 7. Just as the rich rule, the poor.

So the borrower is a servant slave. To the lender. To the lender. And just so you get the phone, know we do one profitable week and we chat about it. What does that mean to you? Just as the rich rule? The poor? Yeah. You're a slave to whoever you're indebted to. Yeah. You're in debt. You're a slave for that.

Yeah. You're a slave. Most people are slave to their debt, their mortgage, their house payments, all the toys they want to have. Yeah.

Yeah,

Gary: I, I have a [00:03:00] weird relationship with that. In the sense that, um, and this is where, you know, if I'm talking about real estate often, a lot of my close friends, people that know me well, will say, oh, you're Debbie Downer. You're like, oh, it's never the right time to buy a house. It's, you know, houses are overpriced.

It's kind of a lot of, you know, the blowback I get. But, um, which

Kyle: I think actually increases trust with you being a realtor, saying that. 'cause most realtors, most realtors

Gary: are pumping tires. Best

Kyle: time to buy was 10 years ago,

Gary: which it was, but I mean,

Kyle: or now. They'll say Just buy now.

Gary: Right now, now, now, now quickly before the rates drop and the house prices and I mean, let's go back to the power of the week and then we'll talk about interest.

'cause I'm, I really, uh, if I had to choose between talking about the power of the week or the interest you choose Interface. I choose the interest rates. I'm a real loser. Sorry.

Kyle: It

Gary: just

Kyle: says the rich rule, the poor. So the borrower is a servant to the lender.

Gary: Yeah. I mean, Proverbs are interesting in the sense that, um, they're not absolutes well, we had a sermon about that, right.

Pastor Matt did a good sermon when he, when he preached on, uh, the suffering of, [00:04:00] uh, job of job. And, uh, yeah, he just did a really good job of kind of articulating, you know, basically. You know, you take some proverbs and then you move into the same guy wrote Ecclesiastes, right. And, you know, everything is meaningless and you know, it's like chasing the wind and you know, so you gotta get that dichotomy a bit.

Um, but I do feel like debt is crushing and so debt, ironically, at least in business or my experience where I was going with it, I was gonna say, I abor a lot of money in my life. I've had millions and millions of dollars of debt, especially like. Back probably seven or eight years ago, I owed a lot of money.

Um, and I think that timing is everything. And, uh, a friend of mine, a business guy, Alex, he always says like, timing will make you or break you and you don't get, and, and the beautiful thing about it's, you don't get to take a lot of credit if you're successful. And if you do get crushed in a business deal, you don't need to wear it on your personal self.

You just, at the end of the day, you know, at least for me, that's how I look at it. It's like, Hey, you know what? Nothing risk, nothing gained if you don't want. You know, if you're, if you're, [00:05:00] and that's a good point. If, if you shouldn't wear the loss, you shouldn't wear the gain either. No. And so I think I, I feel like in like.

God's sovereign. And you know what? Some people are supposed to go broke. God is what God. God's sovereign. What does that mean? It just means that he's fully in control. It means that he knows he's predestined things to happen and we are very powerless and I feel like we don't, if people are gonna live like you know, everything they do, I.

You know, then you're taking a lot of credit and like I said, you know, we sure don't wanna be taking credit. I would take zero credit for any of the things that I have. I think that it's been a gift and I think that we just need to be stewards. So it's back to the

Kyle: debt thing. Do you struggle with that though?

Like you must take, have times that you feel like it's your smartness or? I always feel

Gary: like it's my responsibility. But even that's probably not healthy, where it's like, who am I to think that just by, if I work hard enough or if I, yeah. I mean, we're called to work hard. The things are all separate. Yeah.

We're called to work hard. We're, we're called to not take on as stupid amounts of debt, and the [00:06:00] Bible would tell us that, you know, you don't wanna be slave to the lender, so, you know. But does that mean you can't borrow any money? No. Um, I feel like there's different places where you would borrow. You know, I feel like even as in your age, you know, when you're younger, you could probably handle being a little highly leveraged because you know, you got good working years, you got a lot of energy, you got the capacity.

Would it be wise for somebody who's really leverage on what matters too though, right? Well, cash producing assets, yes. And if that doesn't make sense to you, Google it and like figure it out. Like don't be boring on things that depreciating assets like cars and you know, buy, drive a piece of crap if you, you know, and that in our culture that's countercultural, like people just have a car payment, right?

And. There's probably times for that. You know, if you're in a spot where you really can't afford a big repair or you know, you can get a really interest free loan. But you know, we're gonna go into the environment now coming forward where the car dealerships will be GI promised, giving you 0%. Again, that's not close to, it's not,

Kyle: yeah, that's not, well, you're prepaying

Gary: for it.

I know. I know, I know. But it's the incentive, right? It's the, it's deceitful. Okay. That's fair point. There's no such thing as a [00:07:00] 0%. Yeah. When interest rates go really, really low though. The cost to pay. The cost to the benefit of paying cash is very minimal.

Kyle: Yes,

Gary: I would agree with that. Right. You know, because if the company is getting the debt, they'd rather take the margin.

They'd rather make the margin on the product. Right. Yeah. And just keep, keep, you know, let, but if

Kyle: they're selling an $80,000 truck at 0%. You know, and then somebody's paying for it. Someone's paying for it. 'cause all of a sudden if you can pay cash, it's 70,000.

Gary: That's not that common. If we go, it'd be interesting if we go back to that, but it has not been that way.

Yeah, fair enough. Yeah.

Kyle: But it's interesting because it reminds me of something I read yesterday. Um, this is from Solomon, the smartest and richest guy that has ever lived. Or maybe not richest anymore, but definitely smartest, wisest. Then I observe that most people are motivated to success because they envy their neighbors.

But this too is meaningless, like chasing the wind, like chasing the wind. Fools fold their idle hands, leading them to ruin. So don't be lazy, but then it says, and yet, peop better to have one handful with quietness than two handfuls with hard work and chasing the [00:08:00] wind. It is better just to have like a calmer life and not be like, go on full pole.

I'm like, Ooh.

Gary: Yeah. I guess that what you just, that's really cool that you read that too. I think that that's where everybody can, anybody could get into trouble with scripture where it's like if you cherry pick verses Mm, you can defend any. Yes, you can defend a lot of things that are not, not biblical, right?

Yeah. Because anything taken in isolation is dangerous. So context matters. And, um, yeah, I think if somebody's in the word all the time and all the word the Old Testament and the New Testament, you, you, you'll, uh, you know, that would be, that would be wise. That would be prudent. Anyways, that is a great, great text.

And, uh, I guess where, what I was gonna finish off with is that in, in business. When we are in a low interest rate environment, which we're heading back to. We have a before. Are we before actually, because I,

Kyle: I actually thought about the government lowering rates as just like the government forcing the Bank of Canada to do that so they can get by votes.[00:09:00]

Like do you think there's actually control of meddling on there? Oh, there

Gary: probably is. It's, it's disgusting. I don't know if people that watch our pod, I don't know why people watch our podcast. So I, I mean, I don't, you know, it's, it's, I'm just being honest. I, but a few people tell me they won't. Right. Or family?

Mostly my brother-in-law. Um. Jeremy Ward last night, but, uh, basically, uh, couldn't, couldn't take it one episode. That was enough of Gary Kyle. But the, uh, where I was going with that was if, if, uh. There probably is interference to some extent. Yeah. I think probably more now than ever. Um, because the, the government has the most debt of anybody, right?

The Canadian government, provincial governments. We are going, at some point, we are going to have to have austerity as a province, as a city, as a country. Austerity meaning austerity, meaning we are going to have to have governments that lay people off that spend less than they make that make hard choices, like, you know, talk to any family that's.

In, in, in personal financial trouble. At some point [00:10:00] there needs to be a change. Yeah. And unlike, unlike a person, a government, as a general rule, at least in our, you know, we're a G seven Nation cannot just declare bankruptcy. I mean, they do. There's governments that do, there's governments, you know, there's, there's whole.

Plate things that have wiped changed currencies and Yeah. You know, whatever. But, uh, so at some point we're gonna have to have really hard times and, uh, no government gets elected on the promise of hard times, you know? So even now we have a, like a, a conservative party promising, you know, common sense and change and hacking and whacking the hacking and whacking.

He's not talking about the pain that's gonna come, but it's gonna affect everybody.

Kyle (2): Yeah.

Gary: You know, I mean, when you own a business and all of a sudden a bunch of people, maybe they work for the CBC, but if they're all getting fired. They're not gonna have money to be coming to spend at your store like you normally do.

If you're a business owner, they're not gonna be eating out at that local restaurant. Right. Yeah. They're gonna have to make hard choices or they're gonna be competing for the job that you're in, and maybe they're willing to do it for less, which, you know, I would argue creates a healthy economy. Like a, yeah, I believe in the free market.

Um, but the free EE, even from [00:11:00] for milk. Even for milk. I'm, I mean, I'm fine with the communist system we have 'cause I'm in it, but I mean, I, I can understand that it would be challenging. Yeah. The only reason, let's talk about supply management a minute. For those of you that don't know that might have a few American listeners in Canada, you have to have quota.

It's very expensive to produce chicken meat. Produce eggs and to produce, uh, dairy milk, which means that if not anybody can just go buy cows and start milking cows. You need to, they can, but you gotta buy the quota. Yeah. You can't just buy the cows and start selling the milk. You get in deep trouble. And that's actually a whole nother issue I have.

And the price's raw market here, I don't, I don't agree with that. The, the price is set. The price is very set. It's set to producer, the processors. Um, I have been farming since 2011. I started from scratch. I, I started with 13 cows. I borrowed $550,000. All borrowed money, bought quota. It was my dream to farm.

My dad never touched a cow or tractor in his life, and I, I, I do believe in the system. What I was gonna say, and this is important, well, first of all, in the US they have a similar system now in a lot of states. So it's, it's very ironic. [00:12:00] Oh, interesting. The quota does not have the value that our quota has or hasn't yet, and it really ebbs and flows because the processor there controls the quota.

So by us, it's our government that has kind of implemented this quota system. Why is there, why is there value on quota in the first place? Why Couldn't have just been like the minute something's limited, there's value. It's no different than a taxi cab license. In New York City, they had a certain amount, but when they implemented, when they implemented

Kyle: quota, however many years ago in Canada, yeah, it had very little value.

Very little

Gary: value, yes. But as people started to realize that, hey, you got to make, anytime in a business that you're guaranteed to make a margin, you're guaranteed to get paid. That has value. Yeah. Like run a real business for a while. That's one thing that some dairy farmers who have not, like lots of dairy farmers run other businesses and are, are very astute.

Some business farmers have only ever been in dairy. They don't understand how amazing it is to have that milk check show up in your account twice a month. Mm. It's like the sun coming up. It's that reliable.

Kyle: Yeah.

Gary: And because I'm in other businesses where people owe me a lot of money for a very long time and some people don't pay you appreciate.

Supply management more. Makes sense. So I guess, yeah, there's two [00:13:00] pieces. One is they have it in the US too, so US producers that get fired up and talk about wanting to flood our market. First of all, our market's tiny. It's not an, it's not an effective, efficient market like Canada is.

Kyle: 90% of people live within a hundred kilometers of the US border.

And

Gary: Yeah, but they still live spread out over 5,000 kilometers. And it's less than the state, less the population's less than the state of California. So like for them to think that there's any benefit to come wiping out our milk market's ridiculous. And they'll still never look after the northern parts of the province.

Right. Yeah. So, you know, our, our system does do that. And, um. The other thing is milk is a perishable item, so it's not like a grain, you know, even a grain farmer, they used to have the grain elevator. The elevator, you know, people were happy they got rid of that system. Um, but grain you could store for a whole year and you could sell it the next year.

Well, milk is just like, it's gotta be on the shelf. And I won't say the wrong amount of time, but very quickly. Right. It's past, so. Okay, moving on. I'm talking about quote a I can tell I'm very passionate about, uh, about supply management. Well, because it, it takes a [00:14:00] lot of flack and I, and I, I see the benefits and the negatives.

Okay. You know what I thought? I think I, I feel like I'm pretty objective.

Kyle: When, when Maxine Burner ran for the Conserv party a couple years ago. Yes. And the amount of farmers that came outta the woodworks and became, got interested in politics because they thought maybe their supply, they were, they

Gary: thought they had to start voting for the liberal party or ndp at that point.

They were like, what is abortion? Didn't, that didn't get 'em that fired up. But when you start touching their money, but they thought they're gonna touch the quota. Watch out. That's a hard word for the, for the Christian conservative

Kyle: dairy farmers. That's awesome. Um, okay. Fruit of the Spirit moving on this week is goodness.

I find this one, uh, quite similar to like kindness and the other fruits of the spirit. Fruits of the spirit being the, what the Bible says are the fruits of you being a Christian. So what does goodness mean?

I read about it before actually the, the podcast look at My Goodness, and it, it was about, uh, trying to be a blessing to others, intentionally trying to. Lift, make others'

Gary: [00:15:00] lives better. Yeah. And you can do that in a lot of ways. You can do that materially. You can do it just by words of encouragement

Kyle: saying Hi, smiling.

Yeah. Opening doors for people. Buying people meals. Goodness. Yeah. I don't have a lot at table with that, but. I hope it's, I mean, it's a good thing to be made a big, the people that have made the biggest impact on my life are full of goodness. Full of goodness. Okay. Beautiful. Well, not all of them. I mean, 'cause you were one of 'em and it's not full.

I would say Savage Quarter Tank. Okay. Uh, we're gonna go to the mailbag, um, and talk about some feedback. But before that, this is gonna get published on September 11th. And I think next week, Wednesday. Yeah. And the day after is the Freedom Sessions, uh, opening night. Oh, yeah. Uh, talking about, uh, yeah, tomorrow, it'd be tomorrow night if you're listening to this when it's released.

Yeah, totally. That's right. And then the following week, which is I think the September 18th is the first class. So if you're [00:16:00] listening to this and you live in the area that we live in, it was just chillowak. Why would some, should someone consider going to this? Or if you're not in the area, setting this up at your own church or community, whatever.

Yeah.

Gary: Yeah, anybody can run it, you know, with a bit of direction and I'd be happy to walk alongside anybody. Um, I just think that most people

Kyle: what let back, what is Freedom Session?

Gary: Well, we've talked about it before. Um. It's basically a healing and discipleship journey, and it is based on the 12 steps, which right away people get wigged out 'cause they're like, oh, I'm not a drunk, or I'm not a drug addict.

I don't need the 12 steps. But it's just, it's completely Christian. It's based solely on, uh, on Jesus and the power that he gives to, uh, help bring healing to, to people. And, uh, I don't think. I don't think I can act, articulate it that well, but I've never met a person that's went through it and done it and said, I wished I wouldn't have done it.

So, I mean, you've seen a lot of people go through it and I've seen hundreds of people go through it and, and most people that I know that have done [00:17:00] it give back in a lot of ways once they have done it. 'cause they're so pumped with the freedom and healing they have so that

Kyle: not nothing has no program or course or anything has got close to what Freedom Session did for me.

No, no. It hadn't made such a huge impact. Okay. Um, so yeah, def definitely recommend it. It's gonna keep making an impact on you. Yeah. And I'm gonna go back. Okay. What are you gonna do with this time? Uh, a lot of different things. A little bit of weed, um, which we'll actually talk about on next week's

Gary: podcast.

I wasn't ready to talk about it, but we are gonna discuss it. Yes. 'cause we got a lot of, a lot of blowback and a lot of feedback and, and it's, I didn't, to be fair to Kyle, I wanted the,

Kyle: the four. The four. It was the full gamut. Of like, well, of course

Gary: it was. 'cause everybody has an opinion and every opinion's different.

Yes. But nobody's opinion actually matters. So we, we gotta dig, we're gonna dig pretty deep

Kyle: on it. Discuss it. Yes. Anyways, if you don't think you should need Freedom Sessions, then you should sign up and, uh, take it or get it going. Yeah. Okay. Mailbag. [00:18:00] How to build authentic relationships or friendships with men and not just have surface level conversations.

Which I think this could be applicable to women as well, but

Gary: it's very applicable to women. I would argue it's harder for women. Based on my feedback that I get from my wife and from others. Hmm. My wife has really good friends now, but it is been very hard. It's been a long journey. What I'm gonna get in trouble if I start speaking for women.

I, I know where I'm going with this and I know I'm gonna get in trouble, guys. Yeah. Let's just, okay. Focus on your side. How, like, do

Kyle: you have authentic relationships and friendships? And if you did, have you always had that? Um, how, how, how did they start? How do you think people,

Gary: my wife just read that book on a DHD in marriage.

And read me pieces, and it's been very enlightening. Okay. Um, I have, I have very deep relationships with guys. Yeah. Uh, especially a lot of guys that I'm walking alongside. I don't feel like I have, like, I just, I don't feel like I have a normal guy. Friendships like some guys have [00:19:00] in a good way or a bad way.

Well, I don't care. So I mean, if, for me it doesn't even matter. What do you mean? What do you mean normal? I guess Marie and Marie could describe it better, but, um, you know, a lot of guys will like, you know, they go hunting together and they'll hang out for a week hunting. Like, first of all, I don't wanna hunt for a week.

Yeah, me either. Like, if I'm gonna hunt, it's going to, it's not gonna be animals. And it's like, I don't, I guess I don't see, um, yeah. So what does, what does friendship look like in your world? I mean, if, if somebody is very like-minded and has a lot of the same interests, I'll be super, like, I'll be very intentional and we'll spend time and talk about those things.

But I don't have the, uh, I don't have that casual like, Hey, hanging out with the guys and watching hockey or watching football, like, I just don't have any of those things. Yeah,

Kyle: I don't have a ton of that either.

Gary: Yeah, it's 'cause of the A DHD.

Kyle: Yeah. Just no small talk. Can't do small talk.

Gary: No, no. Cannot do small talk.

So, uh, I hate small talk, but in that it's been a real gift. Um, [00:20:00] because basically your experience, and I guess on this question, whoever asked that question is, I feel you are really good at being really deep now. Do you have deep friendships? I mean, that would be another question, but you definitely, I would say I deep, I've, I've extremely deep friendships.

Okay. Yeah. Like, I

Kyle: like Trey, you, Peter, Hedstrom, a few other guys that I'm just like. Um, do your friends or are they always changing? No. Or do you have long time, long time friends? Yeah. Stephan Cappers. I've seen, we've gone for coffee once a week for 10 years. Okay. That's awesome. Like, and just know everything lives and been lives

Gary: been real.

Been real. Yeah. That's beautiful. Pray. Pray together all the time. Okay. Just be real. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. And I think that, I mean, even, I mean, I was bugging you about smoking pot, but, um, despite all your flaws and my flaws. Uh, and in your case in particular, I, I respect the fact that you have those. There are nobody I know off the top of my head anyways, has more personal deep conversations with men than you do.

And even I, I talked to another buddy that you had sent me a phone number to and I'm meeting him and it's like, [00:21:00] that's just a beautiful thing 'cause sports is great. Yeah. And the weather's great and farming's great, and all these things are good things and beautiful things that we've been gifted with, but none of them actually matter.

Kyle: Yeah. I think the only reason, the reason that that is the way it is though is just because I'm open about my, my, my crab.

Gary: Yeah. So that, that would be the answer to that question. Yeah. How do you have it? You lead by example. Yeah. You start by being vulnerable yourself a bit enough, and then don't be afraid to ask pointed questions.

Yeah. Just be real. Just be real. Yeah. And to me, like I would agree with you, zero, just to hang out with people and have pointless conversations, like zero desire. Like let's just get to the meat, let's, let's, yeah, let's get to the heart. Right. And it's special. Like even one of the things about, uh, freedom Sessions that I always encourage people who are thinking of leading or going back again.

The best part about it is just being in that close, like getting to know five to seven, some people that are introverts and hate, you know, whatever, hate close relationships that they're hearing this and they're thinking, that's the main reason I wouldn't go. Yeah. Um, but if you're someone that longs for that, it's a [00:22:00] beautiful, I love it.

So I just feel like, man, it's pretty special to care for others and to be cared for at that level. Actually,

Kyle: one of the things that. You know, I, I didn't really know friendships or closeness growing up, and so, um, it's kind of been something I've been learning and talking to Trey who was in the special forces and, and like went to war together and, you know, and, and ran into buildings where, you know, there's, there's firefights and stuff like that.

I asked him, I said, um, how many close like friendships do you have? Like, how many people do you think would like jump up and. Like fly over if you needed them. And he's like 20 or 30 guys, like 20 or 30 guys. I'm like, how is that possible? Yeah. He's like, well, I went to war with these dudes. Um, and so there were just like an extremely high level of trust and they just knew he knows everything about it.

Um. These guys and they know everything about him. And, uh, but there's something about that, that brotherhood thing that like, is just, if you have that, I've actually read it in a couple verses later. Um, in, in the passage I read in Corinthians is, is [00:23:00] just like you, we can't do life alone. Like if once you're, if you're alone, that that's ring you're deep trouble.

Deep trouble. Yeah. Like it genuinely actually just says it right here. Um. Two people are better than one for they can help each other succeed. If one person falls, the other person can reach out and help, but someone who falls alone is in real trouble. Likewise, two people lying close together can keep each other warm.

I'm suggesting you just do that with your iPhone, but how can be one wouldn't be warm alone. A person standing alone can be. Attacked and defeated, but two can stand back to back in conquer. Three are better, even better, but for a triple braided cord is not easily broken.

Gary: So let me ask you this then.

Somebody that's listening and, and is not, you know, doesn't have those type of relationships and what man or woman is just feeling like, Hey, I don't really have anybody that's caring for me that well, how would they go about finding that?

Kyle: I mean, freedom Session is a great place to start because it just like, it, it, it, it facilitates the conversation every single week and it allows you to [00:24:00] slowly like, get into it where you're not like forced into it. Like, yeah, well, I guess you are. It does go pretty forced into, it's pretty straight, pretty quick.

But yeah, it's a great question. I'm not really sure the answer to that, but I think it's just still being like trying to be friends, trying to be a blessing to other people. Like

Gary: lead by example, even if you don't feel like it. Yeah. And doing the right thing when you don't feel like it's hard. Yeah. Okay.

You, but that's where most people act. People always think the feeling comes first. It's no different than in a marriage or anything else. Yeah, that's right. Yeah. Feeling we all know. So,

Kyle: and that's like having a hard time. Yeah. And if you just shoot 'em a text or give 'em a call and say, how's, how's it going?

How's your day? Yeah. And just listen for five minutes. And, you know, say, sweet, just wanna check in. It's like, it's, it's really basic stuff. Um, and, and sometimes it can seem presumptuous, like, why are you calling me to let you, why do you actually care? And stuff like that. And some people don't want to actually have those calls.

They don't want to actually be open and stuff like that. And so then they resist it. And those are the guys, you don't have friendships. Even

Gary: smaller things. I think, like I've seen, uh, my wife do it and people, friends have done it for her. Like they bring like a, a four or $5 coffee. Like not a huge [00:25:00] sacrifice.

Like just literally come over, Hey, are you home? Bring it over. Hey, I was just thinking of you. A favorite drink or whatever. Like little, very little things, right? Like,

Kyle: yeah. I mean, people can do even do that on overtime. Just give five bucks and help a show out. Just small friendship things. Okay, next question.

Um, how to balance work, family, kids, exercise, small tips and routines on how to stay consistent.

The best way to stay consistent is just to do it every day. It's really simple, like how to build a habit, a habit of something. I think about this I was talking to, uh, um. One of the guys I'm working with this week about this, I hate brushing my teeth. Okay. It's something I just hate doing. I hate the taste.

I re like, but I never miss a day. Okay. And it's be, and I don't really think about it either. Uh, it's just something I do. Yeah. So it's a habit you build. Once it's a habit, then it's not hard anymore. But only way to build a habit is just to start doing something consistently. Don't stop.

Gary: I think one of the things I've learned is to have realistic goals.

You know, so [00:26:00] people tend to, and some people that are close to me in my life tend to be like. Very just unrealistic, like just set, start small and do what you like. You say, do what you said, like just do it, do it, do it, but start at a reasonable rate. People have these grand, audacious goals of getting into a certain type of shape or going to the gym.

You know, if you know that it's just gonna be too much work. Day, week in, week out to go to the gym, don't have it be the gym, you know, I mean, you can get a treadmill basically for free off marketplace right now or whatever, bike or weights or, you know, just start very basic. And like for exercise for me, the last year has been, my motto is any exercise is good exercise.

So like, if I need to have a long talk on the phone with someone, I'll walk our road a bunch of times. And is it the same as getting on the spin bike and sweating like crazy? No, probably not. But it's, it is exercise and it's healthier than not moving. So. You know, that's been my motto and that's worked for me on that front.

And the areas I struggle way more are in, are the intentional relationships with my kids. [00:27:00] And that's the part that I'm, I'm still working on and really struggling with my wife. It's like, Hey, am I taking the time to sit and listen? I think it's also also like we so goal oriented that we're,

Kyle: we're tempted to do like really big grandeur things, right?

That's what we wanna do. And I read the book The Compound Effect a few times, and I'm more and more convinced that if you just do this very small thing over a long period of time, that. The, the compound affected. That is wild. I mean, 10 minutes a day of Bible reading is 60 hours a year. Like that's 60 hours is a long time.

Yeah. Some people aren't reading 60 hours in their whole life the way that the, the,

Gary: the path they're on right

Kyle: now. Yeah, exactly. So, but it's like a, it's a small thing, right? So like 10 minutes of any sort of thing and, you know, set other things up in your life. So I, we have, I have a lockbox, you know, that helps stay staying balanced and stuff like that because, you know, I'm an addict in every way, you know, and I just go extreme.

So I need those things to control me. Um, one thing I did this summer was I, uh, I'm working with a buddy of mine, um, and he said, Hey, how can I help you? And I said, I was like, God, there's nothing. I'm like, no. Show up at my, my house every morning at five 30 and if I'm not [00:28:00] outside to go drive to the river to go do a cold plunge, um, you can ring my doorbell.

As many times as you want until I come outside. And so I was motivated to be outside by five 30 'cause I didn't wanna have my whole family wake up. So I did that for 50 days. And the first like 30 days just are not enjoyable at all. But pretty soon you just get used to it. And now it's really easy for me to wake up at five and, and go hop in a cold river.

Yeah. Or in, in, in the cold punch and have in, uh, switch up my hot tub to be a cold punch. But, um, so yeah, I, I needed someone like with a buddy, with a buddy

Gary: to, it's pretty opinionated. Pieces of, some people think coal plunge is total bs. I talked to a nurse the other day and she's like, that's not even normal.

It's not healthy for you.

Kyle: Your body thinks it's dying. How can that be good for you? Yeah. I, I haven't done a ton of research on it and it, I know it's a fad and, and people can like jump on the bandwagon and stuff like that. I don't really know if there's that much benefit to it, but I, what I do get, Ben.

Other people swear by it. Right. I got buddies that are just like, well, I think it's what I, what it wakes me, wakes you up. You know? That's [00:29:00] nice. And doing something hard seems like a very unpleasant way to wake up to get freezing cold water. I like use my alarm set at 5 25 at five 30 in the cold water.

Wow. But, um, it wakes you up. And when you do something that's uncomfortable every morning, if there's a subconscious like win in your, in your mind and it makes it, you're mentally tougher in the day. Yeah. Okay, so beyond that, I'm sure that I,

Gary: that I could, that I can

Kyle: believe. Yeah. And it's 'cause of mine actually.

My, my, I just put battle tap water in life.

Gary: All the battles in life, all the battles in life. Are one and lost right up here? Yes. In each person. Yes. That's what most people don't understand. Yes. You'd be amazed what you can do. You can, people are like, oh, you did that? And I'm like, oh, I didn't think I was capable either, but I just kind slowly worked at or tried it and I failed, or it was whatever.

And then, you know, most people are capable of way

Kyle: more than they realize. And results take a while. Like two years ago, I was 285 pounds, two 80 pounds, you know, like two, five. Now, HH hovering on there, like, I didn't, you didn't get there. Like it was two years ago. Yeah, it took a while. Yeah. A few weight loss [00:30:00] bets.

A few weight loss bets. Yeah. Okay. Um, two more questions here. We'll answer. Uh, should women wear skirts? Which interesting question that even came in, uh, twice. Should you go to church twice? Is that actually in the Bible or not? We'll answer those in overtime. Uh, but before that we'll answer the two other ones.

Now, which one is God will not give you more than you can handle. Is that true? No.

Gary: No. Can't handle anything. We have on our own strength, we're in deep trouble. I had a really, really. Horrific thing happened, which I can't talk about, but happened in the last week. And I was fascinated once again how those things bring me my knees. I should be on my knees way more, but those things bring me to my knees and I feel like, yeah, I'm just shocked at how, um.

We're not meant to be handling anything on our own. So that [00:31:00] those types of things, those types of beliefs are, people are always wondering like, Hey, how come this is so hard? Or like, life's hard. Life's hard, and if life is never hard for you, then maybe you're not doing what God's called you to do. It's a, or in

Kyle: your

Gary: denial.

Or you're in denial and you're totally in some Ethiopia state. But I mean, we are called to be obedient. We're called to be faithful, and that's gonna look different to everybody in a different stage of life. And we're not qualified probably to tell other people what their faithfulness looks like, but, but my experience has been that life is pretty hard and that character character's only built.

When you are struggling, there's no character built in good times when you're drinking wine at a winery or you're having a delicious dinner out with someone and you're having a fun time. Like that's a beautiful thing. And that's a gift. And I think we need some, some, all of us, no matter how tough we are, need some level of, uh, well, we want those blessings.

We're, we're,

Kyle: we're, we're men. We want be strong. And you know, it goes against their pride. Yeah. But

Gary: people, people is in general. Our human nature is that we would just avoid pain, avoid suffering. Yeah. And by doing [00:32:00] that, we, we

Kyle: create a lot more problems. Yeah. Because actually I said, read a quote from Paul Washer a couple weeks ago.

He said, there's no such thing as great men of God. There's only weak, pitiful men and a great God and a great Christ that helps them.

Gary: Yeah. So to me, that would, that would basically answer that, that quote. And I mean, I'm, I should be able to spit out a lot of verses. I'm not thinking of them at the moment.

But yeah, that, that is a great question. I, I think because. We've had whole sermon series at time on suffering. Uh, and job, job was a great one. Um, and Matt, Matt did a lot better job than I ever could, but it was just kind of like, yeah, that idea of, uh, of, of being faithful and, uh, through hard times and I.

And I always struggle with, 'cause I look at some people, they just seem to have so much more hardship than others. You know, you see, look at some families and they've lost children and they've lost multiple children or, and they've just had such suffering. Right. And I think like, but yeah, we don't, on this earth, we're not gonna have the answer to a lot of things.

And so,

Kyle: yeah, I think one of the most helpful things I've learned is just be okay to pray. Help just the word help. And we'll just repeat it over and over again. Like help [00:33:00] be. Yeah, I just, yeah, because I, I,

Gary: or even why sometimes I just lament, like this week it was just like, what? Like, yeah, God has not, I don't have the answer, but I just feel like that crying out has.

Yeah. I mean, what else do you do?

Kyle: Yeah. Um, one more. God, what was it? Godliness is cleanliness. I guess I can look. Grab it now. No, you don't need to.

Gary: Um, yeah, clean, uh, cleanliness is next to godliness, right. That's a Dutch person for sure. That sent that. That's such a Dutch thing. My wife. So I married a non Dutch lady and my wife is very clean and very organized.

Probably more than I am actually. Um,

Kyle: I think Godliness is managing your stuff well, which is like whatever that looks like. Yes. So. There again, it doesn't have to be like your windows are perfect.

Gary: No, but there's a broad spectrum, right? And the person that's listening to this and is thinking, Hey, you know.

This is my, oh, cleanliness doesn't matter. Like they probably do need to be better stewards and the people that have a tendency to be super psychotic about cleanliness and can never relax, you know, there's [00:34:00] ver there's a story about that, right? Yeah. You know, so, uh, but what I was gonna say is my wife in the Dutch culture, like when I got married.

My sister did a skit at our wedding, and she dressed up as a Dutch tutor, nanny Tudor nanny lady, right? Like, and my cousin, who's a dude, which I mean, this was 10 years ago. Times were different. Anyways, he dressed up as a pregnant Marie chained to the stove. Like my sister had a chain to the stove, which I wish, anyways, I wish I could watch it again, but, um, you don't have it on video.

I paid for it. I paid prepaid, the guy to video my wedding. Yeah. And he had some personal struggles and I never got the video. Anyways, I, it's somewhere out. There've forgiven him. I've forgiven him and totally gotten over it. But anyways, that it was too bad. Nice guy. Just, I don't know exactly what was going on in his life.

Now that I'm thinking about it, I should probably check in on him. But anyways, that's not on video. Or at least if someone has it on video for my wedding, I would love to watch it skid. I would pay money for it. Um, but anyways, she was just telling him, Marie, [00:35:00] like how to cut. The Gua and you know, gotta have all the clothes on the line.

'cause the Dutch people, it's a contest who can have all the, the most clothes on the line and whose car is the cleanest and whose lawn's cutting the nicest. And, and there is some of that, right? There's some of that in our culture where, and the, and, and the worst part is, is it's, it's, it's. In my life, the experience has been that it seemed to be more important than what was on the inside.

And there again, that's human nature. We're all like that. But I just feel like

Kyle: because there's a, a part of culture that's a good thing. Like I did a ton of traveling all over the world. Yeah. And you see a lot of different cultures and what, and what people are, you know, used to doing and stuff like that.

And everyone has their, every culture has their thing and that's kind of, kind of cool. Are there messy cultures? Probably, yeah. There's messy cultures. Yeah. Yeah. Just don't care about anything. Yeah. And so there's clean culture too. I think it's, that's fine. I think it's when you start associating your culture with like Christianity or your faith or your faith, stuff like that, be like, oh, this cultural thing we do is now also the cars all has to

Gary: be clean on the lot, otherwise you're something, whatever it is that's, you know, and I think it's easy to do just

Kyle: because if everyone around you is doing that, [00:36:00] you know, and you kind of associate it with

Gary: peer pressure.

Yeah. It's peer

Kyle: pressure worse when you're a kid or an adult. An adult, yeah. 'cause the things that you're pressured on are way bigger. Okay. Okay. Anyways. Heading into overtime. Uh, thanks for listening. Um, if you wanna watch overtime, go to patreon.com/furiously. Curious. We answer a few more questions. Uh, we love your support for the show.

If you do get support, you get to watch that content as well. But until next time. Oh, before we go, did you watch the podcast with Brian McConney? I have not yet, but I will. Okay. So we'll react to that LA next time as well. We'll talk about that next week, next time. And we

Gary: still have not watched the one with for guns either, which is Pastor for Guns, which is great.

Okay. Looking forward to it. Okay, thanks guys. Have a great week.

Kyle: Hey guys, thanks for listening to another episode of the Briefcase in the Barn. Hope you enjoyed it. If you wanna listen to some overtime clips, uh, I'm gonna play a few right now and you can kind of get an idea of, uh, what overtime's all about.

And if you, uh, wanna watch those, you can go to patreon.com/furiously curious and enjoy those. [00:37:00] So, uh, this is what you would get with that. Take a look. And she said that it would be more offensive to go in pants as a woman to the school auction than as a guy to go to church in shorts. People will take any manmade

Gary: thing and turn it into their religion.

They will take any tradition and turn it into their religion. The Bible does not say you should go to church twice. The pe, there's people that are completely religious and pull. Verses outta scripture to try justify why they have to go twice.

Kyle: Okay. If you enjoyed those again, uh, patreon.com/furiously curious, uh, five bucks a month.

Um, and, uh, we started these in episode four already, so you can go back and watch all the different overtime episodes if you're interested in that. Otherwise, uh, thanks for watching. Uh, please like, uh, the videos subscribe to the channel. Um, rate the show on the different, um, podcast apps so that you can do that.

On, goes a long way. Leave a comment on social media. Um, um, send some feedback, uh, via the website, furious curious.co. Um, in the contact form there. [00:38:00] Also, if you have questions or things, topics you think we should talk about, uh, feel free to shoot me a message there. Um, there's gonna be an, you can send messages anonymously if you want.

So hope you enjoyed it and I'll uh, see you guys in the next one.

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