April 9, 2025

Being Crushed, Fostering, & Kyle's Lawyer Journey - The Briefcase and the Barn - Ep 38

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Speaker: [00:00:00] Okay, welcome back to another episode of the Briefcase in the Barn with me and Gary, a series of a furiously curious show where we talk about business, life, Christianity, and more. How's it going, Gary?

Speaker 2: Good? Yeah. This is, uh, whew. Feels like it's been a long time since it's recorded. I went to Alberta last week.

Speaker: Yeah.

Speaker 2: And, uh. Yeah, bit of business. Went to a dealership there. Uh, that's selling the same type of equipment we're gonna be selling in Rosedale, schaefer's, Schafer wheel loader. So that was interesting. Beauty equipment. Yeah. Well, you saw one. Yeah. It's amazing. You've been, uh, you got your red Uh, I'm so excited about my red sweater.

Yeah. Why'd you, how'd you get a red sweater? I worked at the auction.

Speaker 3: Okay.

Speaker 2: Is that the main reason you work there? To get the red hoodie? Yeah. Okay. Conversation starter in town, right? Yeah. It's good to get out just. I'm inside a lot. Right. So, okay. Find out who all the good to work. Find out who good to go.

Good to put 15,000 steps in. Okay. That is a lot. You were huffing around that yard. Yeah. 15 Think on Saturday I had 11 or 12 and I mostly just paced the one line where all my [00:01:00] steps, I was worried I was

Speaker: gonna outdo my, my, all of my steps from

Speaker 2: last week. Okay. It's interesting to me in the auction just. I mean, by the time this gets released, the auction will have come and gone, uh, Lord willing and to be all over.

And it's like, we're like surmising now. How many lots we're gonna have. We're way more than we've ever had before.

Speaker 3: Mm-hmm.

Speaker 2: So yeah, pretty large. Uh, just a lot of stuff. And, uh, I mean my, I'm always terrified right, that it's not gonna sell for enough. And you know, some stuff always sells light. It's an auction.

Some stuff sells for more than it should. Yeah. It's just the way it is. People get Yeah. It was just cool for me to watch,

Speaker: like I've, I'm not a business I'm ever seen. Before an auction auction, an auction type business. Um, but everyone has their role. Okay. Everyone kinda knows what they're doing. And, and you're making a, making a quick chaos.

Organized.

Speaker 2: Well, it's super interesting because everybody there, like, we don't normally run that business. Okay. It has like an end date and a start date. Yeah. Like now there's some people that are working behind the scenes the whole year doing different things. Two people mainly that do a lot of [00:02:00] work throughout the year, but, um.

Uh, the rest of the team is just kind of like filler in, or, I mean, you're an exception in the sense that, you know, you're not working in other businesses that we have, but most of Johnny's employees and my employees just kind of come, take, take a bit of a side step, but of the regular thing and come in there.

You have a farmer, family members that

Speaker: showed up, uh, a farmer from the down the road from you that showed up for a week with this JCB Slope. J Loader, yes.

Speaker 2: Yeah. Ran with him for a while

Speaker: this morning.

Speaker 2: Yeah. Great guy. Um, and so, uh, so it's a community event. People often, we were getting harassed even today by people from Richmond to ask some great guys and they were like, oh, how come, you know, why don't you just set up an industrial yard, run milot these, get a building, you know, compete with able auctions.

Yeah. And if we ever did that, that then it would completely change the feeling of what we're doing. Yeah. So now it's a different business

Speaker: too.

Speaker 2: It's

Speaker: a different business model, almost like it's.

Speaker 2: I mean, a lot of people would just say it's extrapolating what we have and that, you know, there's enough of a market in the bankruptcy for, for closure space in salt business insolvencies, that you could kind of carry on doing that.

And, and I, and I [00:03:00] don't disagree with that, it's just, but by and

Speaker: running it like now, it's like a.

Speaker 2: Two weeks of your life, twice a year. Insanity. And then over. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And it's pretty hard on like, on my family, like for, for my wife in particular. I mean, the kids love it, right? Yeah. You could see that that's a full, full on circus there, right?

Yeah. And children love a circus, as does their father. But the, uh, yeah, the mother in the house is like, okay, this

Speaker: is, okay. So this is my suggestion for tomorrow. Oh yeah. You had a suggestion. How about I take over your, uh, Instagram and I document what goes on behind the scenes at Beekman Auctions? And how it gets everything set up.

Talk to the customers, show their products, show the people that work there. Okay. Ask. Ask you some questions. Ask Johnny some questions if he'll go on camera.

Speaker 2: Oh, he will. He loves the camera. Okay. He's an attention seeking word just like I am. Just a little more subtle 'cause of his background, but no, yeah, just get real.

Okay. Okay. I'm not opposed to it at all. I think it would do well. Okay. Okay. You want full access to the Instagram? I just need your

Speaker: story. Okay. Just drop it on the story. You just drop it [00:04:00] on the story for the day story. Yeah. Yeah. Just you basically go on there and say, Hey, it's Kyle. I, I got, I got the Instagram for for eight hours.

You're with me for next extra hours, and you're just okay. And just, you just pump it for eight hours and Okay. No, I think it's not a bad idea. Okay. I feel more useful too. You're doing practical things there today. I was, yeah. But there's like, I dunno, I feel like outta sorts, right? It's not my, uh, not what I'm used to.

Not your job. No. And I think that.

Speaker 2: Um,

Speaker: but it was good for, it was, it was fun though. I enjoyed it. It was cool getting to meet different people and just like, I don't know, just, yeah.

Speaker 2: Yeah. The reason that it, like, I always tell people, and it'd be interesting to hear your, like, to actually ask the customers.

That's why I'd love to do the takeover for the day and you could just talk to customers and say, Hey, I'm just kind of doing Now most of the customers won't want to be filmed. Yeah. 'cause they're farmers and. There'll be enough politicians. Yeah, there's some that will and, uh, they'll, they might just oblige anyways, but I always find it's people want to be a part of it.

Uh, it's a community thing. It's mostly our family and friends and I mean obviously all different cultures and all across the valley. [00:05:00] Many people we don't know, but a lot of them we know from the auction and from farming and, and people are just super friendly and they're very gracious with us when we do make mistakes.

So I would say considering we'll sell 1500 lots and three and a half million dollars worth of equipment, let's say, there's not that much carnage as a general rule. Now, this auction. When we listen to this, I could be totally wrong. It could be an unmitigated disaster, but so far it's been beautiful. Ever since we went fully online, it's been fine.

Okay. So our first auction was fully like the, the old school yodeling. Oh. In 2018, made no money. Oh, wow. Had like 250 lots total disaster.

Speaker: Okay.

Speaker 2: Um, I didn't know you saw it that way. I thought you

Speaker: were

Speaker 2: always this way. No. No, that was in 2018. Okay. 2019. We tried to do a hybrid model and uh, had a guy named, uh, Josh Butler.

He's, uh, pastor Jim Butler's son. Great guy. He's an accountant. Uh, he's, he has his own practice now in Ontario, but he worked for me in my office briefly, and he's, he built the whole, he. Auction, uh, platform. Okay. Off an Excel spreadsheet, basically. Um, the whole way the math was done in this. And so we were just [00:06:00] learning.

Back then we had a buyer's fee only up to $2,000. Now we have a buyer's fee all the way up similar to, uh, other auction companies. But in 2019 we tried to do a hybrid. So we had the like people yodeling truck driving around, and then we had like online bidding option. I don't even remember who we had it set up through.

But what happened was, is that there was people that were like bidding online, hammering away. They thought they bought the item and the person in the crowd thought we had two people buy lots of, oh, that's terrible. That was terrible. Especially when people really thought that was rough. Especially if it was a deal.

What was that week like? You know, if it was the item where they overpaid? Uh, I ended up in the hospital actually. Yeah. I thought I was having a heart attack. Not surprised, serious. I was just like, now we beat, not surprised. We do have heart. See, my class

Speaker: did that to your mom. Oh, she had a jammer. Yeah. Okay, so you're That was my class.

Okay. But I wasn't there that year, so I get an exception, so that makes sense. Don't be mad at

Speaker 2: me. You were grade seven. I was 18. Yeah, because that when she had the heart attack, she was at home. It was after school. I remember I was on my way to work or something. It was like in the afternoon and she was like blue and clammy and cold, and I'm

Speaker: like.

That was the year [00:07:00] after I got outta the Insane Asylum and I had to, okay. I had to bike to work, no bike to the YMCA every day for school. That's where my school was. Okay. And I one I school, or I was just one, I one with a tutor from the bike to the YMCA and back every day. Okay. How long did you do that for?

The whole year. Okay.

Speaker 2: Year off. Yeah. Whew. I struggled in those years. I struggled basically all the way from grade six to grade 12, so it's a pretty good stretch. I'm still struggling. I still struggle. I would definitely struggle if I had to sit in a school. Parents very mad. Okay, so tomorrow. We'll be good.

Oh, you're okay. You're, you're thinking already. You're planning. No, I was, I was just, yeah, absolutely. You're planning your, uh, your questionnaires for the Instagram. Well, we'll see. It will probably be a slower day and we'll, actually you

Speaker: wanna hear something funny? Yeah. I already, um, started messaging, um, my assistant Mary about it about an hour ago.

Okay. Since I got the idea of the different types of questions I can ask and how I can film it and

Speaker 2: ask the gr, the gr gr will tell you exactly what the.[00:08:00]

Speaker: On that note, there's that feedback form you can fill out. Uh, it's in the description. You can win a 10 week coaching program for me. So have you been getting feedback? Uh, it comes out, um, this is gonna come out next week Wednesday. It comes out this Wednesday. Oh, okay. With the podcast from last week, so, okay.

This is the second week, so ends soon here and I'll pick a winner. Oh yeah, last week that was smelling salt's

Speaker 2: episode. Yes. It's been a long day today. I felt like I needed some more, but I was wondering if they're addictive. Are they addictive? Marie thought they might be addictive. She said anything that's slightly could be addictive, you should be fleeing from.

So, which is prudent. You fleeing from a lot of things then. I know everything. You least be fleeing

Speaker: from life at that point. I know. No, it's all good. What was actually interesting on Sunday's sermon about, um, who, gluttony. Yeah. I was wondering what you thought of it. Yeah, I like that. Would you consider yourself a glass?

glass Yeah, a hundred percent. Yeah. I actually, uh, in church I was imagining myself like. Walk up from the couch and go to the fridge like 20 times. Just listen evening, just made me think about it. Evening, just looking just for something, look grazing, just looking for something and [00:09:00] usually there's nothing there and I just go sit back down again.

But like I'm definitely not, I'm doing the tendencies of trying to

Speaker 2: Yeah, I found it very convicting too. I thought the, uh, I mean it feels, obviously when you feel convicted, it feels like the pastor speaking right to you. It was just, uh, when he talked about just excess and he did say, he talked about, you know, how you could be obese.

And maybe not be a glutton, you know, he, yeah, he gave that example of, you know, and he said, you could be very skinny and be gluttonous. Right. Yeah. It was more about your thoughts, your heart, where your heart's at and Yeah. What you're trying to, it was about filling the void, right? Yeah. And obviously all sin is like that.

It's just trying to fill the void. Uh, we're desperately long. So the message I got out of it was just like, okay. Like,

Speaker: well, I think it was pointed because, so we started off with Jerry talking with Jerry Bridger's book, um, respectable Sins. Yeah. Which talks about basically all the sins of Christian culture that we don't think are an issue.

And you know, let's slide when other ones we don't and like have this like weird system. And so. Uh, when he started preaching about gluttony, I was like, huh, I don't know. I'm not, I've heard this before, or whatever else with that. But you [00:10:00] have, yeah, like just, well, we write about it, you know, I've heard other sermons about it, so I didn't think it was gonna convict me, but it definitely convicted me.

I think it just because I think it's easy to minimize, right? It's just like, oh, whatever. Like, everyone eats a lot, everyone does this, like goes to food or whatever. So yeah. He also

Speaker 2: said it's fine to feast. I think that's the point. That's right. That was, it was just, I thought it was really healthy balance and I was appreciative of that.

He was touching topic of every day a feast.

Speaker: Every day.

Speaker 2: Yeah. I just feel like in our, there again, it's, it's we, we pick the things that we want to pick on in church and the sins that we go after. And in certain cultures you might not go after, you know, drunkenness 'cause people just drink a lot. And that's just the culture.

And other cultures, people just eat like crazy or they do other inappropriate things. Like no, just preach through the word. And if, and like I say, he just preached on the text. Right. Yep. So I appreciated that.

Speaker: Wanna do a book? Yeah. I actually, actually had some questions right now for you. About the book? No, let's do the book first.

Very, very briefly. Okay. Very briefly. Get flack every week. Right? Okay. That's okay. People can have flack. [00:11:00] The gospel's just not

Speaker 2: popular, right? Like people just don't, it's not that. My wife said, why don't you just read the whole book? Like, why don't you just have the section? Hey, you monotone reading. To be fair.

Yeah.

Speaker: To be fair, I listened to it last week. Okay. Last episode. And I made one note. Does Dean read it himself? No. Dean Ortner? No. No. Like I, I listened to our episode that we recorded. And I listened to myself reading and I'm like, that is terrible. I should read way less. Okay, so you were So take it away. Oh yeah.

Speaker 2: started off with, uh, Kyle. Okay. We're doing okay. So we're

Speaker: doing

Speaker 2: chapter nine, advocate on the book Gentle and Low Lee Reading book. Great book. Great book. Just despite how bad we butcher it. And you can't stand us reading it. It is a great

Speaker: read. So I want, I wanted to start off with, uh, and I thought about that.

What is the difference between an advocate and an intercessor? Like, can you explain that in layman's terms? So I'm gonna just ask you what's the difference between an advocate and an intercessor?

Speaker 2: The two ideas overlap, but there's a slightly different nuance

Speaker: in your own words. I can't, I can't, I, I couldn't do it.

And [00:12:00] intercessor is, um, in the middle of two parties and doesn't pick a side. An advocate picks aside and says, Hey, I'm advocating for this person on my behalf. Advocate

Speaker 2: steps over and joins the one party. Yes.

Speaker: So Jesus is just not in the middle of us. He's advocating for us. He's actually a step closer.

Yeah. And he's talk, he says that that's a neglected uh, teaching that doesn't get, um, yeah.

Speaker 2: So, um, why can I, can I interject? Just, I'm thinking a lot about your podcast with Matt. I'm thinking by the time people listen to this, they might have listened to that. I'm so curious. Did you finish it? Yeah, I listened to the whole thing.

Um, I just found like, there's a text here, um, John, 1, 2, 1, right in the beginning, right? Yeah. My little children I'm writing, and this would be, you know, to anybody, but I'm writing these things to you so that you may not send, but if anyone does sin, so who's gonna sin? Everybody, obviously, right? Yeah. But if anyone does sin, we have an [00:13:00] advocate with the father, Jesus Christ, the righteous.

Who is we? Who is we? And it was just, uh, I mean, you guys talked a lot about kind of like the, the bent of our upbringing and just how people might view the gospel, right. And the skewed view they may have, or you know, obviously Matt comes out from very much, I mean, mostly completely aligned with what we think.

That's what's interesting. That's why I hate labels. That's why hate these jobs that we were, I was blown away how close it was. I couldn't, I couldn't, I couldn't find it. Wow. It's really disappointing. That's why it's so disappointing when people start putting derogatory labels and then put people in that cap.

But anyways, yeah. So that was a total rabbit trail. I was just, the question is, okay, I wanna read one piece. Why? Why does it

Speaker: matter? Like, why does it matter that we have an advocate? Like how does it help us? The text tells us he is righteous. He and he alone, we are unrighteous. He is righteous. Even our best repenting of our sin is itself plagued with more sin, needing more forgiveness to come to the father without an advocate is hopeless to be allied with an advocate.

One who came and sought out other than waiting for him to come to him, one who is righteous in [00:14:00] all the ways I'm not. This is a calm and confidence. This is calm and confidence. Before the father, father, man, this is why I don't read. This is why this is, this is why people have already skipped it forward.

But yeah, it's, it's, uh, we need him. I think the last, just to, to wrap it up, just the last, uh. Thera, the very last paragraph. Mm-hmm. Go ahead. I have it underlined. No, go ahead. As you were, you're a really good reader. Do not minimize your sin or excuse it away. Raise no defense. Simply take it to the one who is already at the right hand of the father advocating for you on the basis of his own wounds.

Let your own unrighteousness and all your darkness and despair drive you to Jesus Christ, the righteous and always brightness and sufficiency.

Speaker 2: Yeah, it's always interesting when I, you know, whenever you, you think about who might be listening to something or even reading this or hearing you read it, it's always like, hey, there's, there's, there's two calves.

Right? There's those, I mean, I, we would almost argue that there's maybe three. You might not, but it's like, hey, there's people that are like, for sure not saved, not Christian, don't care. There's some that are, you know, [00:15:00] fully confident that they are, some have quite a bit of assurance. Yeah. And then there's a whole nother camp that listen to this, that are.

Yeah, they probably don't know. 'cause it's just like they've been, they're so terrified of making the wrong, you know, just of, of having false insurance or whatever. Right. And I thought that the pa the bottom of page 90, do

Speaker: you think it's also don't know or don't want to admit where you actually are?

Because I think that sometimes if you have to like find out, you might find an answer that you don't actually like. No, I, I think it's a lot of just being, so I, yeah, so, because it's hard to face the facts, like that's why facing the truth and freedom session is so hard because what have to do is you have to face your sin.

You have to face how bad you actually are is in denial about that.

Speaker 2: Yeah. The thing, listen, the devil will use whatever. Yes, he can. In our, in our, in our heart, in our mind. To deceive us. Yeah. So if we are someone that, if, if you and I had grown up in a culture where there's easy believe is, which obviously wasn't, but if we'd grown up in that, he would use that hundred percent.

He would keep us distracted. He would have us doing all kinds of things and where we grew up in the other end of the spectrum where [00:16:00] doubt we're taught to doubt, it's almost like a, it's almost like a badge. Yeah. I remember saying badge of honor where saying it the more doubtful you are. Yeah. And, and Matt said it really well on the podcast.

Yeah. He's like, oh, so you don't, you don't trust God then you don't believe God. And that is a fact because God's word, and there again, we were brought, brought up in the way that hey, everything in the Bible's true. But we, we only put an emphasis on Psalm verses, right? This is

Speaker: why like Co Kim's coaching of me, like just slammed me in the face because I have to realize that just because you say something is true, but you don't actually live that out, that that doesn't actually, you don't actually believe it's true.

Like your actions show what you believe. If you actually believe it, you, you, you behave. You show up differently.

Speaker 2: Yeah. So a line here is the Bible nowhere teaches that once we have been Savingly United with. Christ, we will find grievous sins to be a thing of the past. On the contrary, it is our regenerative state that has more deeply sensitized us to the impropriety of our sins.

Our sins feel far more sinful after we become believers. But it's interesting [00:17:00] that, at least in my experience, it's been like anytime I've really screwed up and stumbled, I ev all the doubt comes and the like, and I just think of all the ways I've judged other people or just, yeah, even just, just. I feel like a bag of crap, right?

And I think, Hey and that. And I think the devil just uses that, right? And that the whole point of this book I have found, which is the beautiful thing about the book, is that come to Jesus when you feel like that. When you feel crappy. And of course the devil wants us to be secret. And people, and I know those people listen to this, their sin is a secret and they feel like people won't love them.

They have, it's too, the cost is too high to come clean. And I just think, boy says, what a travesty. He says,

Speaker: God. God says, trust me.

Speaker 2: Yeah. And there again the words are, trust me, the words are easy to say, right? But it's actually taking that step of kind of coming out of the darkness. That's,

Speaker: yeah. But I think, I think it's important to like emphasize it though, to say like, I'm the God that made that insane sky tonight.

Like I, what I say in here is true. If you do what it says, confess your [00:18:00] sins and repent and come to me and get real, you will have eternal life. Like it's like. It's do you trust that or not? Like you have to do something with it. It's not a, you can't be passive in your unbelief. You're act actively rejecting Christ or you are, have accepted him.

I don't think there's room for, uh, like excuse or room for, they don't own it. You looking at your phone? Are you actually thinking about what I'm saying? No, looking at my phone. Okay. That's what I always do

Speaker 2: when I'm talking. Did you find anything interesting? No. I got all kinds of show notes. I wasn't sure what we were all tackling today.

Oh, okay. I did get the feedback from one of our faithful listeners that there was no need to rash and the time didn't matter. I mean, yeah, I thought about that tonight. I was like, oh, we can try it tonight. It'll go a little longer. Joseph Poll. Oh wow. Calling him out. People are gonna send him angry messages.

[00:19:00] No, we like the short format, Joseph. Yeah, that's right. If you don't like it, don't No, that doesn't matter. Now he, he, he's totally right. He said

Speaker: he, he said he got some, uh, connections, um, from last time.

Speaker 2: Okay. He also said, uh, I mean he made a really good point. You can just forward through and like my wife when she hits the book chapter, like she just speeds right on through.

Right. It's like half the people do. So anyways, um. What did you think of the feedback on the, um, somebody gave you feedback on Jen's podcast?

Speaker: Oh yeah. Um, yeah, I don't know. Like it's, it's, it's really cool to see that, um, people know about safe Families more. It's like, it is just a super awesome organization and, um, the fact that she came on and got a highlight, it was awesome.

Okay. I wanna go back to, uh, quickly though, um, the podcast with Matt. You listened to the full thing? Yeah, I did. Um, what did you, so what did you like about it? What'd you think about it? [00:20:00] Because I thought when I was done, I was like, this was, I thought it was really good conversation.

Speaker 2: Yeah. I feel like, um, I mean I know Matt really well, like, I think pretty well, pretty good friends with him.

Um, I think he was probably a bit nervous to be on there. Like he's actually extremely funny. Uh, he, I think you knew he had his own podcast, him and his wife for a bit, right? Yeah. Yeah. Um, so I thought, you know, I thought he might be a little more entertaining and I talked to him uh, a couple days after he recorded.

He did bring me candles at the start. Yeah, that was weird. But he is weird, so that makes sense. That's the kind of humor though, like I just don't dunno what you're getting. Yeah, yeah. You don't even know what you're getting. He's very genuine. He is a prayer and, uh, he cares, cares deeply for people. And he's also a truth speaker, so like.

I think more than anything in our culture, we lack that. We lack people that can be very empathetic and very loving. Yeah. While still hold on to truth and not get washed away by the Hey. That's why love everybody. That's why I think I enjoyed the conversation. It was [00:21:00] just

Speaker: like, it was just, it was so genuine.

Like it was like we were having,

Speaker 2: it was real. Yeah. Yeah. And of course, you know, I know where you're coming from and the questions you're asking and, and I know where he's. Yeah. Bamboozled being, you know, new to our culture. And, and I do think I've had actually feedback from other people too, where we probably need to be careful in the sense of, hey, this is a bit of a, I don't wanna say niche market, but it's, yeah, it's a very small pocket

Speaker: of, okay, so, so he gave feedback.

He texted me after last week, after he listened to it, uh, after he listened to it. Yeah. And after he listened to our Briefcase of the barn episodes. Okay. And he said, uh, both you and Gary recently said that the overarching messaging Christianity Today. Tends toward the breath and judgment of God. I'd say that it's almost unique to your experience and upbringing, largely throughout the Western church, especially the love and grace of God has been overemphasized to the point of resulting in a nonchalant attitude toward the holiness of God and the coming judgment.

Speaker 2: Yeah, and that's fair. And I think if you, if you went back to how we were raised, and there again, I, you know, wanna speak for the people that were, [00:22:00] um, teaching us at that time, but I can totally see that the concern there was. Was fighting that. And I mean, when you are pushing against something, you will tend to swing too, too far the other way eventually.

That's just human nature. That's why you're always listening. Yeah. And I feel like, um, even for myself, I sometimes, I, I don't, I get this sense of being heavy handed at times. I get this sense of, um, in church leadership and, and things of just like the weight of, boy am I being judgemental? I, I know I am actually.

It's not even, I get the sense of, I'm like, I know my heart and I'm like. If I look at the grace that I've been given through my early twenties and, and, and even up till now, how gracious people are for my shortcomings and more importantly, how gracious God's been. Yeah. Right. And like the trajectory of my life where it's like, wow, I have really hurt people.

I have really been set awful things. I've really caused carnage in people's life. And like, no, God can still be, he still used me. So I think. But I get where Matt's coming from when he says [00:23:00] that it's more that, you know, the holiness of God is literally never taught and the weight of sin and the consequences of sin and it's, it's serious.

So like there is that balance, right? And there again, I would say that, Matt, what, what is the biggest sin in the world rejecting God? I.

Speaker: rejecting

Speaker 2: Christ. Yeah. Rejecting unbelief. Yeah. Un not believing in Jesus. It's the biggest in the world. Yeah. And it's really interesting. Paramount,

everything else.

Yeah.

And so that, that's, I think you guys probably could have even hammered it harder on the podcast. I think it felt like at one point I could tell you exactly if I listened to it again, I could show you exactly where it was. And then you deviated another subject and I thought he was gonna touch on it. Um, because Matt would is very pointed and um, and I feel like anyone that's listening who is.

In a situation where they're in a very religious environment but not a Christian. Like it is a real, that's a really dangerous spot to be in. And there should be, should be no comfort there. That's right. And it's fascinating how, you know, as we become, you know, if we get into the Christian, what we would quote unquote, I'm doing the quotations, Christian world or you know, regular church going world, you know, if there is some [00:24:00] level of comfort because you were going to church every Sunday.

You have been, you are sorely mistaken. You were deceived. You were deceived. And so that is, you know. I think one point he asked or you said, oh, like why would you even go to church? I think he asked it.

Speaker: He asked. Yeah.

Speaker 2: Yeah. When I asked myself that. So then I quit going at one point in my life. 'cause I just had a moment of clarity.

If you're honest with yourself, if you're honest with yourself, yeah. You would get to that spot where you'd be like, whoa, don't be deceiving yourself. Know where you stand. Right. You know, and I think there again, because of the over, uh, emphasis on certain doctrinal things, but then suddenly say,

Speaker: people I know know where I stand.

I can't do anything about it. I can't change my desires. And it's like, no, you don't want your desires to be changed. No. You do not want no.

Speaker 2: No, no. For, for many different reasons. Right. And I think that, and, but, but more importantly than that, I believe, and there again, you and I maybe not totally see a line on this, but I do think that there's a lot of people in certain types of churches that do sit there and you would say, Hey, if they're not professing, they're not safe.

But I, I, I would, that's not, I wouldn't say that you haven't say that because I would struggle that, I would say there's probably

Speaker: quite a few [00:25:00] people that, uh, in, in, um, in, in churches where it's that. Very few people lords up heard that there's a lot that are believers that don't dare, don't attend, attend community.

I would agree with that. I would

Speaker 2: say, and I don't know 'cause we don't know people's hearts, but I just think, well, there's so much pressure that's really sad. Yeah. There's so much human pressure, which there is so ironic because

Speaker: it's, yeah. So I, I, I met a guy one time from, uh, a church, a reformatory church here locally where he was in his forties and he had gone to communion his whole life.

Everyone in church did. In reformed church and um, he was in his forties, but he felt like he was not saved. He felt like he realized he wasn't saved. Mm-hmm. But he didn't dare not attend communion. 'cause then he'd get a visit from the elders.

There was so much pressure. Go, it makes sense. No, it makes, that makes total sense. But growing up for us, it would be like, you don't go, 'cause you're gonna get a visit from the elders to go check your story. Isn't

Speaker 2: that fascinating? So what's the moral of the story? Don't worry about the visit from the elders or.[00:26:00]

Uh, yeah. Go, go read your Bible and do whatever God puts on your heart. And that's, I think that's what's missing in, in most of what we do. And it's human nature. You're conviction. They're always judging.

Speaker: Martin Luther said something really interesting when he was convicted on, on the, um, for nailing those things to the, um, board in Germany or whatever.

Um, they asked him where he can't, and he said, I, I can't go against my conscience. He didn't say, I can't go against the Bible. He said, I can't go against my conscience. Yeah.

Speaker 2: Because he was being led by the spirit, so it would've been going against directly what he felt God was telling him to do. That's right.

But there again, we, we, we've never been taught that. Right. That would be pretty strong language. I'm, I'm assuming that's how I live today. That's how I feel. No, I, we, I think we were taught like, Hey, your conscience can tell, tell you when something's wrong. Yeah. But when we say,

Speaker: Hey, we felt the spirit move within us and we were supposed to do this, like, whoa.

But saying, whoa, saying, I felt in my conscience or saying we shouldn't do something, that we should

Speaker 2: do

Speaker: something. So we were only taught what we shouldn't do, not what we should do. That is a big deal. Yes. I I think there is a lot of teaching on, um, what's wrong [00:27:00] and not very, very much teaching on much what, what's right and what you're called to do.

Yeah. That's, that's a huge thing. And what you focus on grows and all of a sudden you can get a really big list of things that are wrong, but a very tiny list of things that are Right. So that's what I got out of the Sunday

Speaker 2: message.

Speaker 3: Mm-hmm.

Speaker 2: Is that, and I think Matt says it, it's like preached toward about right at the very end, and I can't remember the verses, but it was just like, be filled with.

Be filled with Jesus. Just be filled with spirit, be focused on like spend spend time in the Word. It's like, and for me it's like, no, I'm focused on a thousand other distracting things, which are of no importance in life at the end of the day. Right.

Speaker: So,

Speaker 2: so when my dad

Speaker: first got diagnosed with Parkinson's in 2016, I asked him what his biggest regret in his ministry was.

'cause I wasn't sure like how fast he was gonna deteriorate, whatever. And. And, uh, we go there for coffee, the coffee on Saturday mornings. And, um, I expected him to say like, I would've spent more time with the young people or more time with old people, whatever you'd been preaching for like 30 something years at this point.

Yep. And he said that I didn't preach enough about Christ, and I was like, blown away by that. Because I mean, that's a, that's a [00:28:00] heavy thing to say, right? Like there's, there's a lot of, um, uh, pastors that will get down for not preach in Christ. Mm-hmm. Like the Bible talks clearly about it. And I said, so like, why didn't you?

And I figured maybe it was like pressure from like, um, colleagues or coist or whatever, or church pressure, whatever. It's all, all kinds of reasons. Um, but he said, um, that I wasn't drinking from the fountain myself. Not like enjoying Christ himself enough and, and, and, and being that's what being full of Jesus.

Uh, because 95% of what we do every day is reactive. Like only 5% is proactive. So if you try really hard to be Christian, you're only affecting 5% of what you do. If you really want to be changed, your heart needs to be changed. Like, you're, like, you need to be transformed. And, and, and, uh, you can only do that by being in Christ, like knowing him and, and spending time with him and like, and uh, that, that was always, that was a huge, it was a very valuable lesson.

Hmm. I hope he's not upset that I shared that. I guess we'll [00:29:00] find out. He listens once in a while, so, okay. Okay. I had a question for you. What do you believe God will say to you, if anything, when you get to heaven? So you get hit by a payload tomorrow, you're gone. It's possible fear driving it. It's possible.

I did back up one tractor today, back and forward, and the customer wanted to see if it went backwards and forwards, and I, uh, got in. I was like, uh oh.

Speaker 2: But okay. Stay outta the wheel loaders. I mean, my desire would be, and I, in freedom session, I get to that spot where you write down kind of, you know, you, you, you, you basically like, I don't wanna talk all about it 'cause I don't like getting people ahead of themselves that haven't done it yet.

But you just kind of, you get to that spot where you're like, Hey, well you view, you think about the end of your life. And I do. Anyways. It's talked about a lot in our house 'cause we've had a lot of death and, and just, yeah. Parent stuff in our going on in our life right now, but um, yeah, just like well done my good and faithful servant.

Right. That would be like a beautiful thing to hear. Right. And I think that because I am self like similar to what we, [00:30:00] well, similar to what we read in the book. Like I am super sensitive and I know that even. Yeah, I just feel the weight of being not present enough or, you know, doing my marriage meeting with my wife and her saying like, I mean, she just tells me like, you're not present, dude.

It's not good. Right. So it's like that conviction. Um, but no, we have an advocate.

Speaker: We have an advocate. Yeah. I think, uh, um, I mean, because of Christ, he will look at us with joy. I think. Like he will have joy in his eyes when he sees us. Like how that's, people might even say that's like, how can you say that?

Whatever, like. No, like because of the cross, like it was enough that he can, when when we die, he will agree us with joy. Yeah,

Speaker 2: I always feel like, uh, this came up the other day too, we were talking with some friends about it. Uh, depending on what church you go to, there's very different views on end times.

Right. And like es eschatology and just kind of the way, um, the way the world's going to end. And I feel like we went to a church in Mexico when we were down there [00:31:00] with my in-laws, my brother and sister-in-law. And it was very much, uh, had a certain bent. And I feel like my shortcoming has been that I've avoided.

E even boat haven't just a lot, I mean more now since you know, Marcus died and just thinking, you know, just listening to his dad and just conversation.

Speaker: Worked with his brother today. Yeah.

Speaker 2: Yeah. Great guy. Asked if he listened to the podcast guy, he goes, no, I've heard that story way too many times. Yeah, too much Ripple diarrhea from Gary Bars.

But anyways, they kinda like the, uh, yeah, I just think one of my shortcomings has been that I've, if I just think something's super divisive and a bone of contention rather than just. Be able to wade through that and not get too marred down in the, in the conflict. I'm just like, ah, you know what? Avoid it.

Right. And that's not right either. And, uh, yeah. Are you a, are you a, a an,

Speaker: uh, people? No. Is it, um, I'm a people pleaser? No. There's something in the, um, a Oh yeah. Are you a peacemaker or are you a conflict avoider. 'cause sometimes you can label as like a peacemaker, right? You're always trying to like, be smart about [00:32:00] it, but if it's, it can easily be con just Yeah.

Avoiding conflict.

Speaker 2: I guess my thing is, is that I've lived in a world where I. Um, especially Christians, which is the most frustrating to me. I mean, I could see if non-Christians do, but when people that call themselves Christians make secondary, second and third tier issues, first tier issues, yes. Don't do that.

And Rome is burning. Don't do that. And we're getting in the weeds on this stuff and I'm like, guys, this is, I can't take it. I'm sorry. Be a knife on the gospel and just. Be like soft on everything else. Yeah. And that's hard to do 'cause it's the petty little things. That's how we define ourselves, right?

Yeah. It's literally defines what actually, ironically, it defines the church we go to on Sundays. A general rule Yeah. Is a second or third tier issue, right? Yeah. Because we do primarily believe the, the bulk of the church until I Yeah. Believe the same

Speaker: thing. And we, and we are all constantly sinning on all the second and third tour issues every day for us in the army dates.

I know. So like no matter what ones you agreed to are good or bad, you are, we're all still doing that. So yeah.

Speaker 2: Um, somebody asked about our, uh, had it put a note on there about our [00:33:00] fostering journey. Oh, yeah. I don't know if there's anything in particular that I could share about, but No. Other than I'm a huge advocate for foster care.

I got one foster care. I've got one

Speaker: other story about another kind of advocate. Okay. Um, we're advocated for myself. You can say it first though, and then I'll talk about fostering after that. Okay. So, um, during Covid, I traveled a lot. I got the poke, got the job. Do I do regret it? Do you? Yeah. Why do you regret it?

Uh, 'cause I feel lied to by the government and, and just like the media and like all, just all the bull crap like that, it was all lies. Like at the time I just needed to travel for work and I was just like, whatever, I don't care. I'm just gonna do it. But anyways, one time I crossed the border back into the us uh, with my brother and, uh, we didn't have a covid test with us, a negative covid test with us, and we could have got turned around.

Um, and go get a test and come back to our house. Is this story again to get someone in trouble? We both ended up in court. Yeah. Okay. We both ended up in court, so, um, I crossed, we crossed the border anyway, got an $1,800 fine each [00:34:00] for crossing the border without a negative test. And, uh, then a couple months later, I, um, came home.

I had cov, I had covid like 13 days earlier in the States. I was gone for quite a while. On the 14th day. On the 13th day, I crossed the border, drove across. And, uh, they said you have to quarantine in 14 days when you get back in your house. Can't leave your house. I forgot about quarantining. I forgot about quarantining.

Yeah. And so, and the BC law of the time was only five days. Federal law was two weeks. Oh. I cannot believe we're talking about this. And I, I had all offense of

Speaker 2: people are having PTSD. Awful. Really angry now. It was awful. I can't believe. Fired. Remember.

Speaker: Remember guys, this, this is the same liberal government that's currently running their country.

Yeah. New government, new guy, new guy. Who will probably get elect elected if you guys go, don't go out and vote. Oh, it's unbelievable. Anyways, and so I went home, but I didn't quarantine. I was just went about, I just went to work the next day, whatever. Yeah, business usual, and then all of a sudden got a call from a cop one day and he is like, Hey, where are you?

I'm like, I went home. I lied. And, uh, he's like, oh, okay. [00:35:00] Um, how's quarantine going? I'm like, eh, it's fine. He's like, can you uh, open the blinds and show me that you're inside the house? And I'm like, uh, sorry. I'm actually not home. He's like, oh, can you come back home? Um, and so I came back home, whatever, and, uh, he talked for a while, whatever, and he left and he came back again.

He wrote me a $3,400 fine. For leaving my house and I was, I was so upset. I actually lost the officer. It was like the, anyways, it wasn't good anyway, so I took 'em both to court and you can get a lawyer and they told you all the ways you can fight these, these fines, whatever, and stuff like that. And I was like, uh, I can't afford a lawyer.

So I did a whole bunch of research on how to represent yourself. And so I had like a whole, had to go to court five times and I had like a whole case and did a whole bunch of research and proof how I believe that this was against the law. Um, the lady that gave us a ticket at the border was there like a year and a half later as a witness.

Um, and they, the, um, crown had defense and they got a, examine her and then I gotta ask her questions too. [00:36:00] And I was asking her questions. I asked her op opinion, her opinion of the law. And then the, the judge was like, you can't say that. It's all kind of stuff. Anyway, so I was representing Martin too. Um, yeah, I got it thrown out.

Speaker 2: Okay, so follow sales. You become a lawyer one day.

Speaker: Yeah, which is funny. I was

Speaker 2: talking to John GR this morning who I used to work for. Oh, wow. Oh man. Okay. Yeah. People do have issues that work for John g Grinch. There is a common denominator here, so I think it was only three days, but in the three days, yeah.

I think I

Speaker: peppered in with questions as like. I don't know. I was probably, he builds character man grade people that

Speaker 2: work for him have character, but he told me, you should be a lawyer. Won't you grow up? Oh yeah. Told him that today. So at Jan stand, my grade four teacher said to you, lawyer or politician

Speaker: to you?

Yeah.

Speaker 2: Yeah. And I took law 12. Okay. Yeah. Through whatever it was, through, I can't remember some online thing back then. It was the beginning of the online thing when I graduated. Yeah, yeah,

Speaker: yeah. Okay. Foster care. What's it like to foster? Five kids and adopt them. [00:37:00] We have adopted and have,

Speaker 2: we have fostered four children.

Three of them that we adopted, the little guy we have not adopted. We have a current foster child. Okay. Just

Speaker: quick go from the top. So you have, first you have Noah.

Speaker 2: Yeah. He was adopted, uh, locally as an infant. Okay. A private adoption. So very unique experience. Um, moderately expensive. Pretty expensive, I would say.

Okay. Not moderately, pretty expensive. Um, then we have interesting journey. Even that, like where you go on a list and then people pick you from a book. Oh, right. You know, so like Noah was, uh, when we were waiting to adopt Noah, um, we were moving, Marie and I were living in like the suite of a barn out in Rosedale and somebody, uh, I remember we come back from this event, it was like a Brian Dirksen little private, uh, business thing in, in, in Abbotsford.

We basically. Got home and late at night, some lady calls, the social worker calls and says, uh, hey, there's [00:38:00] some lady in labor right now in the newest Westminster Hospital, and she picked you guys, uh, the Christian Dairy Farmer couple to be uh. To be the birth parent. So she didn't even know our names or anything.

She had just looked at the book one time. She didn't know how far along she was. She didn't know anything about like, yeah, she didn't her anyways. Her parents didn't know crazy that she had, uh, had a baby. So, so that was very unique experience. Um, and I think that's just because Marie was pretty young, still relatively young at that time.

I think 24 just. Hard, right? Like your whole dream is to have a baby. And of course all her friends and si everybody's getting pregnant. Not her sisters, but at that time. Yeah. But her friends and then we, after that we were like, whew, there's like a lineup of people waiting to adopt babies in bc right?

Yeah. Um, um, so we thought, oh, we should adopt internationally. We thought, okay, you know, there's less people that wanna do that. It's a little, a little more prohibitive 'cause of the cost. So we started, and you guys talk

Speaker: about how many kids you wanted to adopt. Or you just one at a time?

Speaker 2: No, just, yeah. One at a time.

[00:39:00] Right? Yeah. And it's pretty interesting holding your little guy. I think I said last week, like, that's a stage that gets you in trouble, right? When you hold the babies. I was gonna bring them on today. We both like babies. I was gonna bring him on today. I'll text you first. Yeah. No, he's the cutie, right? And just, yeah.

Children are, they're, they're innocent. They're, they're sweet, they're precious. Um, and the thing is, and I realize this as I get older, looking at the trajectory of my life and everybody around me, that's done very well. Materially anyways, but even just in general that are healthy and Yeah, and have good relationships.

I think like you're born on third base. I look at all the people that I know that are living on the street or people that I visit that struggle or go to other countries. It's like it's just a matter of who your parents are. Like you don't get to start raising your hand and saying, oh, I'm amazing. Like no, you're literally just, yeah, you won the genetic lottery.

Right. So

Speaker: not even that circumstance, like third base as in like still in the womb, like.

Speaker 2: But yeah, your mom didn't do meth while you were exactly in the womb. So things like that. So we've experienced all of that. So yeah, so we had decided to adopt, uh, internationally. Um, and I, I think [00:40:00] Marie and Marie could correct me.

It'd be a good episode. Well, sometime when she's on, well, 'cause we are gonna get, have more people on and then she could really, she loves talking about it too. But yeah, I think we're gonna go from the US and then I can't remember what the reason was, but I think the, uh, weight from Japan was short, like very short.

Um, and it was not that common. It's not a hag protected country. It was, I wouldn't wanna say too much more about it, but it was pretty, anyways, that's where we decided that adopting was from Japan. And, uh, yeah, I mean, I. Our daughter, Hannah, who's now eight years old as of today, um, she, we got a call and there was many couples in front of us.

So there again, that one, they just go through the list. It's like you're number one, you're number two. By the time, you know, and I think we were three or four, but Hannah only had one kidney and then the other where the other kidney is supposed to be with cysts. And so I distinctly remember the day I remember exactly where I was.

Marie came running outside and said, Hey, there's, there's. Everybody, the people I had, I guess had turned down the baby. Yeah. Her because of she only had one kidney. People are very particular. And this is why I struggle with these types of [00:41:00] adoption, to be honest. Um, and, and I'm, I'm not saying I disagree with people doing them, I just, I personally Yeah.

Struggle with it and it leads into the kind of the rest of our story, but I. Yeah, we went to Japan. A uh, met her, we got there when she was 30 days old, and we arrived, like we hadn't slept. We flew overnight and then it was about eight o'clock at night when we got there, something like that. And we took a cab, a long cab ride to our hotel or to our apartment that we rented for a month.

And like, they literally dropped the baby off, like. 45 minutes later, like with a sheet of paper and walked away, like it was just bizarre and Oh, wow. Yeah, it just felt, it felt very weird and like the way the adoption was at that time. You know, it was expensive. It was so much a day, us up to 30 days and 30 days they capped out.

Yeah. So it was just like, all the 30 days to stop, here's your baby. And so, yeah, it was really cool. It was, it, I mean, Hannah's, I mean, I dunno, you know, Hannah, Hannah's an amazing young lady. Yeah. Um, and yeah, her story is special. So we were just, um, blessed to have her. And then we, that was in [00:42:00] 2016 and we had did the two kid thing for a while.

We moved again a few more times. Um, and then we started fostering and I had always, I had fostered as a single guy in my early twenties. I tell that story. Said that on here. Yeah. So that was unique in of itself and so I've always had the heart for that. And Marie. Uh, ended up having that too and just really feeling,

Speaker: that's episode one by the way.

If someone was say, oh

Speaker 2: wow. Way back. Yeah. Okay. Yeah, and I could do a whole episode just on talking about that kind of stuff. Um, 'cause I believe as Christians that we do a lot of beacon off about a lot of stuff, but we don't care that well for the orphans and the widows. Like, we just don't, we don't, most of us just don't even want to know about the carnage.

'cause it's overwhelming, which is fair. It is overwhelming, but we should all be wearing some of that weight of kind of, you know, and I think that, uh, fostering. Is a step past. Safe families. Safe families is a very gentle way. Yeah. Fostering is going one more step where you're, you know, getting involved with the Ministry of Children Families.

Um, and for us, we started fostering and it's funny, this is the, this is literally is the, uh. This would [00:43:00] summarize, fostering the experience. We signed up for kids five and under. We had two little kids we're like, Hey, five, they gotta be younger kids. The very first girl to show up at our house was 16 or 17.

They're like, well, we got the, and wonderful young lady met her since she's doing really well. Um, so that was kind of just a unique experience to have, have a young girl and she just didn't stay that long. Just if you, it was respite or something like that. So that's another thing you can do when you sign up for fostering.

You're not signing up for what we've signed up for where you have a, and I'll get to that story, but you'll have babies and then they get. Yanked outta your house or whatever you can sign up for. Just, Hey, we take kids only when someone else needs a break. And we have people that do that for us. Yeah. Just for a weekend here or there.

Yeah. We went to Mexico for a week, people, so we took our foster, my parents were respect for me. Okay. Okay. That's not surprising. Sorry. Um, that's, and actually we're j we're jesting and I'm making fun of you, but. People do need respite. And there's no shame in that. And I think it's a lot healthier to say, Hey, I need help.

I think we should create a culture where people can say, Hey, I'm struggling. Yes. [00:44:00] And not just with foster kids, with biological kids or whatever, like human beings are challenging people. And uh, and by the great, we're, we're, we're in. Learning is a, good thing. Oh. And it's a beautiful thing. And it's humbling ask and it's humbling and it's humbling.

So we should all be able to be. Yeah. And I struggle with it so I can beak off all day long. Maybe I'll try intentionally ask for help in the next week with something, then I'm struggling. I'm helping

Speaker: at the auction. Isn't this like,

Speaker 2: no, that's, you're offering to do a hostile takeover of the Instagram feed tomorrow.

Um, okay, so

Speaker: after Hannah, yeah. So then we started fostering,

Speaker 2: and that was in 2018. And then, um, we had our oldest, uh, our, our. Uh, the girl after Hannah come lived with us and she lived with us for a whole year, uh, basically all of 2019, uh, even a bit more. And then her parents had another baby in the meantime.

And we transitioned Gracie back home fully in January of 2020. Um, so kind of all of 2019 back into her parents' home. Yeah. [00:45:00] With her little sister. And then in May, so I should back up. So then we had, we were down to two kids all of a sudden. And then in March, this is Covid, 2020, the hospitals were shutting down.

We went and picked up a little foster boy named Kingston who came to live with us. And um, yeah, that was in March. And then in May, about 60 ago, how old was Kingston?

Speaker: When you got him

Speaker 2: brand new baby. Oh yeah. And I won't say any more than that other than he had some, definitely had some challenges. Yeah. Um, some severe challenges.

And, uh, so he came to live with us and then in May we got a call from the girl's mom and she was having a rough time. And, uh, anyways, they both ended up coming to live with us, those two girls. And then they were in foster care with us for years and years. And then, I don't, honestly, I should remember what.

Days we adopted them. But at some point in the last Kingston, was it adopted the right of way too, or It was, it was all part of the same process. Okay. Yeah. And I mean, it was all just kind of tracking and separate, separate social workers. Yeah. So there's a social worker for the parents. There's a social worker for the child, there's a social worker for the.

[00:46:00] For us, for the, uh, foster. It's complicated.

Speaker: It's complicated. So if someone wants to get into fostering, what's the first step? Like what, what, where can you, the very

Speaker 2: first step is to go to an info session. I'm pretty sure that they still have them. Um, I mean, the first step would be to call someone that's fostered and just say, Hey, can you gimme a bit of a rundown?

And I would say, this is what I always say. If you've thought ab 'cause everybody always like, oh, I've thought about that. Or I've thought, or I've felt, oh, like if you've thought about it, you should be pursuing it. You should at least look into it. Yeah. And don't, don't, don't quench the spirit. Like it's, it's a beautiful thing and like I had a lot of winks to go, but I would say that Marie and I, and like Marie in particular, just 'cause I'm looking at her, it's easier to look at your spouse and see how, but like her character.

Is top notch and like, she's always been a great lady, but she is a hundred times the woman that I married. Like she's an amazing lady and she's her heart for caring for our kids and she is a fighter for our kids and, and it's not easy parenting kids with a lot of special needs. So yeah, I'm super proud of her.

So yeah, we adopted those. Our three [00:47:00] youngest and then, um, kind of in 2022, let's say, or 23, I've gone lost track. Um, and then it was really interesting and I'm losing track of my dates. Well it would've been 23 in 2023 in May of 2023. 'cause now we're 25. In May of 2023, we had five children and they were all young.

They were eight and under. Um, and when we, in 2020, we had five kids, five and under, and we had three kids under two. And two of them are eight months apart. 'cause they're not about, so it's just a gong show. Um, and then it was interesting because that was in May, in May in, in May of 2020. And then within four months I sold our farm that we were living on and moved Marie.

And anyways, she's really happy with that. But, um, then in 2023 we got a phone call and Marie was not even at home. She was at a, a foster conference in Ontario. With some friends gone for three days or something and the social worker called and said, Hey, we have a temporary placement. It's voluntary, it's for 90 days or something.

Would you be willing to, you know, take this little guy, Henry, he's called me and I don't know if there was much discussion or she just said, Hey, the [00:48:00] kid's coming when I get back.

Speaker: Yeah. Yeah.

Speaker 2: So the little guy came, so he lives with us now. That's been over two years. And there again, that is pretty, uh, symptom, you know, pretty, uh.

Kind of symbolizes what foster care can be. Um, but the beautiful thing is, and this is where, and there again, I mean, I'm welcome to feedback or challenging, but like none of us are in control of any of our kids. It doesn't matter if they're biological or not. Yeah. I mean, I'm living proof of that. My parents put a lot of effort in and tried really hard and I really disobeyed and really went sideways.

And so yeah, we all like to think that if we just do all the right things and we check all the boxes and we, you know. Teach our children to fear of the Lord, that they're gonna become amazing, upstanding, and, and maybe they will by the grace of God. But I think that in my experience, and Marie and I often say to each other when we talk about it, it's like, you know, if Lord willing, our children end up doing relatively well in any way, whatever that looks like, it will be a miracle.

It will definitely not be because of our parenting. And um, yeah, it's just ultimately I look at children as in that [00:49:00] moment. You know, you teach them, you love them as best you can in that moment each day. That's what God gave you. You don't get ahead of yourself. Yeah. And I tend to do that 'cause you know, you forward, I dunno if you ever do that with your kids, where you're like, start thinking about their future.

It's like, no, I don't need to do that. Like it, we don't know how long we'll be on this earth for. So

Speaker: it's like, it's like, it's like, uh, when you talk about caring for people, like God does the fixed thing. We do the caring. We don't need to fix anybody, including our kids. We need to care for them, teach 'em, disciple them.

Speaker 2: Uh, we don't need to fix 'em. Yeah, so anyways, the journey we're on now, and it's actually interesting you're asking 'cause it's a pretty important week. So like by the time this gets released, we'll probably have some clarification on. Little guy's future, but Okay. Lots of big stuff going on. So there again, it's, you're so powerless and that is very uncomfortable.

And there again, I'm just gonna speak specifically to Dutch people, 'cause I'm Dutch. It's like, I like controlling things. I like to think, I don't, I like to think I'm easygoing, but I'm not. Yes. Most of the time I can either, like with pure willpower or money, or. With a team or whatever, just, you know, push [00:50:00] through.

I was gonna say manipulate. That's really derogatory, but no, like, it's like if you have the, yeah, if you have capacity and you're well spoken, you can get a lot of things in life. And it's like with this, Hey, God needs to crush you like well, and he's crushed me in this journey. This is one of the main things.

I mean, there's been like three or four, but this has been one of the main things where it's, and I know I'll be crushed again. 'cause it's hard. It's like, and I don't have, I don't have the answer. I think that. If your reason for not doing something though is 'cause it's hard. That's a load of bs. Like that's, that's a weak, that's a weak response, right?

Like if you think, hey, like that's not our calling right now. Especially not if you're a

Speaker: Christian. If you're a Christian, you're call to be like Christ and we just to lay down your life. For others, it's just to give, it's to it's, it's to sacrifice. It's having

Speaker 2: said that, and that just to, sorry to interrupt, but this is another thing I always say is that I.

Nobody's a martyr for being a foster parent or an adoptive parenter. Like everybody has their cross to bear in their life, right? That's right. Often it's, you know what I mean?

Speaker: It's often when it's not one that you don't pick, and it's very different for other people. Yeah.

Speaker 2: So we don't need to compare. I don't, you know, I'm [00:51:00] just on the journey.

We're on. I mean, I think there are challenges for sure to what we're doing, and I know that in particular for Marie being home all day with that, and some people just

Speaker: listen better and don't need super hard lessons.

Speaker 2: I think, I think most, I think most people need, need a lot of lessons. I, I feel like there's just a lot to be learned in the struggle and there's very little to be learned in, in easy times, and it's fascinating how even as Christians and, and people that.

People are just trying to have an easy life. They're trying to have a comfortable life. Like where would you and I'm, so I'm reading this other book, I'm rabbit trailing now, but like Money Possession and Eternity. Yeah. This is by Randy Alcorn. For those of you that aren't can, aren't watching, it's called Money Possession Fraternity.

Randy Elkhorn. I just started it, or I guess I'm A Ways in. I It's a good book. You've read it. Okay. It's been like 10 years, but yeah. Okay. Very convicting. This book, and I know this is Divine Intervention because I talked to a mortgage broker the other day who's, who's a buddy. John Mackey great mortgage broker, great guy Christian Guy.

And his wife, Tamara Mackey is a realtor and they're friends with us. And he said to me the other day, oh, I'm reading, uh, you know this book Money Position Attorney. And [00:52:00] yeah, Tamara said you recommended it. She really enjoyed it. And so now I'm reading it, I'm like, I never recommended that book. Where on the book, I guess or somewhere else.

Never recommended it anywhere. I've never even heard of it.

Speaker: I don't even think I've ever heard of it. We've talked about it. I think once referenced it once or I've referenced it once, I think.

Speaker 2: Okay.

Speaker: Anyways, I never read it. 'cause he has a really small version of that called the Treasury Principle. Okay. Um, I need the small version, man.

I need the short book for John Farmers, which I wanted to do after this book. Okay. Which is like half the size of this digital lily book. Okay. But it's like, it's like basically packs a punch on on money.

Speaker 2: Okay. Yeah. Okay. Interesting. Anyways, so that, that's been what I'm, one of the books I'm reading. I'm reading a few others.

Um, we have not talked about US politics on this podcast. It feels like we wouldn't be or Canadian

Speaker: politics. I'm so upset. No, we

Speaker 2: talked about Canadian politics. We had a short venting session there about, it's terrible. Anyways, we're at 56 minutes. Does not matter. We talk about US politics now or it's gonna go along.

I mean, I still think have I, I already shared my, uh. Do you wanna keep going? No, we, we can shut her down. It's good. It's [00:53:00] late night. No late night long day tomorrow. Option. We keep going. What time is it? It's only nine. Save it for next week. We haven't talked about farming. I always get in trouble for my farming friends when I don't talk about agriculture.

I never talk about coaching. I used to talk about coaching anymore. You could? Yeah. Yeah. I mean, it's. How much do you give away right when you're selling the secret sauce? Secret sauce is showing up and doing the course.

Speaker: That's the only secret work. Secret sauce, doing the work. Okay. Anyways, I am, uh, yeah, I gotta work.

Kyle's

Speaker 2: tapped out. He's gotta work at the auction more. He might have to run the Instagram feed all day. So with that, we'll end, yeah, have a great week pass. If you have any

Speaker: feedback, please do send it in. Uh, I appreciate you guys with that. It did send it in after I started asking about it again, so, and good questions.

Yeah. And good que good questions or sign, um, scenarios that you're dealing with at home or business, whatever you can, you can, oh, that was another thing. Somebody asked about

Speaker 2: the narcissistic parents. I had people talk to me about that. Okay. Since we released that too. Yeah. I thought I could have talked about it more.

I thought there was Yeah. More color. More on the table. More on the table. Been more blunt, but I'm like, ah, I'm gentle. Right. Read your [00:54:00] Bible more. Has lot that all the answers. It does have all the answers, man. Have a great week. Yeah.

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